Posts
Mr. R wrote: "Greetings all. Hope this finds you awake and living in bliss...
Random post... I often get the thought (I'd much rather be dead)... It's not accompanied by a sharp unpleasant feeling like in the past.
In discussion with friends who aren't interested in "awakening" they say how much they love life and want to live for as long as possible. I tell them I'm good to go today. And I mean it... I don't think I'm depressed. A friend tells me I'm very detached (which is probably true)... I don't easily experience pleasant emotions with and around people. I think a lot of people like me but I often don't remember people... I go out a lot and am very friendly and talkative.
I find people talk a lot about stuff that is of no interest to me so I find myself on my own most of the time. I do like music though but also try to limit my use as my primary interest is waking up (I think). But watching non duality videos on line also gets me down... it's hard hard work to be hearing so many perspectives on waking up. Angelo D is my favourite channel but I listen to about 15 or 20 speakers...
At 39 I've never been in a romantic relationship but have written a book about how to meet people for relationships... I have had many casual encounters as I don't get the feelings that are essential for people to want to be around each other.
I'd say I'm very open, calm, relaxed, casual... I don't care too much about stuff generally.
I know that meditation is probably the best thing to do for awakening but for whatever reason I can't develop a practice. I think I would have to leave society for a special meditation place... (I'm an all or nothing person, not a person of balance).
I like writing, reading on topics of interest, festivals, parties... I earn enough money to not have to do much work so my time is my own. I think many people think my life is awesome and it might be but I'd still much rather not be alive.
What is so wrong with being alive? The pain that is caused largely by thoughts... Especially the thought of "who I am." I'm not particularly good looking, I'm skinny, dropped out of school aged 14, move and travel a lot, don't feel motivated to really improve my circumstances (except from time to time)...
Something I hear quite a lot is that I'm a very nice person and I can see why... I am... I do a lot of good for people. Possibly because I'm afraid of people and if they like me there's less likely to be problems. I accept people and don't judge... I give everyone the benefit of the doubt and want everyone to be happy. Really! I wish God could turn up the dial on happiness and turn down the dial on unhappiness... People who have ailments and are suffering more than me still want to live... Yet I have a pain-free body and decent living circumstances and would rather not be alive... (possibly because I'm not connected to anyone or anything?)
I guess I just need to retreat somewhere and meditate until life gets better lol. If anyone has any suggestions, or if they feel the same, would be great to hear from you.
Many thanks
R"
Soh replied:
"Hi and thanks for sharing.
Just my 2 cents, probably others can advise better.
You said: " for whatever reason I can't develop a practice."
You can if you continue and work on it. Highly recommend finding a qualified and awakened teacher too. It takes time to develop but it is just like going to gym. It becomes a habit eventually. It has to build into a momentum, and then it becomes automatic.
"What is so wrong with being alive? The pain that is caused largely by thoughts... Especially the thought of "who I am." I'm not particularly good looking, I'm skinny, dropped out of school aged 14, move and travel a lot, don't feel motivated to really improve my circumstances (except from time to time)... "
There's two parts to this, suffering cause by false identification, which spiritual awakening can indeed cure. The other is issues regarding your life circumstances. There is also no guarantee when spiritual awakening might happen (it can certainly happen at any time, it can take months or years [for me] before even an initial awakening happens), but if you practice and contemplate with an earnest desire to discover your true nature, it is definitely very achievable and many have done so. Life after awakening, especially after anatta, is truly wonderful as I wrote in https://www.awakeningtoreality.com/2021/04/why-awakening-is-so-worth-it.html . Other than seeing through false identity, you also discover your essence, unfabricated instant Presence or pure Consciousness, the aspect of Luminosity. If you discover this and taste this in life, in both background and foreground, life becomes very blissful.. and serves as an important basis for further insights (into anatman, dependent origination and emptiness).
However, this does not mean you should stop working on your circumstances. Spirituality and spiritual awakening should not be taken as a magical pill that transforms all your circumstances in life. You should still continue to work to improve yourself, your life circumstances. In other words, we should not have fantasies that life just 'magically gets better' if we merely meditate. Meditation is important and especially crucial for awakening, but it is hardly the be-all and end-all solution to every issue in life. That kind of naive view easily becomes some kind of spiritual escapism or spiritual by-passing.
Tommy McNally, our admin, wrote: "Tommy McNally:
““I was a fucking mess for years. Last October, I made the decision to change that once and for all: I quit smoking cigarettes, quit SSRI's, and started getting up at 0500, exercising, and eating cleaner.
On the 26th of July this year, I started going to the gym for weightlifting and cardio. Yesterday was my 100th session.
The difference that exercise, a better diet and a consistent, non-negotiable routine makes - physically, mentally and spiritually - cannot be overstated.
I've never mentioned any of this publicly and I'm not posting this for kudos. I'm posting this because if I can do it, then so can you.”
- https://www.facebook.com/100055831473323/posts/326782622526118/ "
You said: "I tell them I'm good to go today. And I mean it... I don't think I'm depressed. "
Maybe low level depression and partly due to issues of identity as you described above. If you are truly suicidal (which based on what you expressed, you are not) then you will have to seek immediate professional help, but even if your 'depression' is a minor one, it can and should be dealt with, and spirituality can be part of (although not entirety of) the tools to improve your mental health. Lack of motivation is also a symptom of depression.
I often send this video to people suffering from depression. I am not a fan of Jordon Peterson, not in the sense that I am against Jordon Peterson but because I have not listened or read enough of his talks to form an opinion for/against him, although I am aware he is a somewhat controversial figure for other reasons. But I agree very much with his suggestions here on depression (and I am simply raising this video on the basis of his credentials as a licensed Clinical Psychologist, not on anything else: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VlDgowUAyx4 )
You said: " Really! I wish God could turn up the dial on happiness and turn down the dial on unhappiness... "
That is good. In Buddhism, the purpose of spiritual awakening is not only about happiness in this life and not just for oneself. In Buddhism, and I consider myself and many consider themselves Buddhists here, our aim is not just 'happiness in this life' but 'freedom from cyclic existence/samsaric cycle of rebirths' and for Mahayana practitioners, our aim is to attain Buddhahood for the benefit of all sentient beings.
John Tan, 2006: "Life is like a passing cloud, when it comes to an end, a hundred years is like yesterday, like a snap of a finger. If it is only about one life, it really doesn’t matter whether we are enlightened. The insight that the Blessed One has is not just about one life; countless lives we suffered, life after life, unending…Such is suffering.
It is not about logic or science and there is really no point arguing in this scientific age. Take steps in practice and experience the truth of Buddha’s words. Of the 3 dharma seals, the truth of ‘suffering’ to me is most difficult to experience in depth.
May all take Buddha’s words seriously."
Related: https://www.awakeningtoreality.com/2018/07/on-supernatural-powers-or-siddhis.html
Also see my comments below for more.
Just my 2 cents, probably others can advise better.
You said: " for whatever reason I can't develop a practice."
You can if you continue and work on it. Highly recommend finding a qualified and awakened teacher too. It takes time to develop but it is just like going to gym. It becomes a habit eventually. It has to build into a momentum, and then it becomes automatic.
"What is so wrong with being alive? The pain that is caused largely by thoughts... Especially the thought of "who I am." I'm not particularly good looking, I'm skinny, dropped out of school aged 14, move and travel a lot, don't feel motivated to really improve my circumstances (except from time to time)... "
There's two parts to this, suffering cause by false identification, which spiritual awakening can indeed cure. The other is issues regarding your life circumstances. There is also no guarantee when spiritual awakening might happen (it can certainly happen at any time, it can take months or years [for me] before even an initial awakening happens), but if you practice and contemplate with an earnest desire to discover your true nature, it is definitely very achievable and many have done so. Life after awakening, especially after anatta, is truly wonderful as I wrote in https://www.awakeningtoreality.com/2021/04/why-awakening-is-so-worth-it.html . Other than seeing through false identity, you also discover your essence, unfabricated instant Presence or pure Consciousness, the aspect of Luminosity. If you discover this and taste this in life, in both background and foreground, life becomes very blissful.. and serves as an important basis for further insights (into anatman, dependent origination and emptiness).
However, this does not mean you should stop working on your circumstances. Spirituality and spiritual awakening should not be taken as a magical pill that transforms all your circumstances in life. You should still continue to work to improve yourself, your life circumstances. In other words, we should not have fantasies that life just 'magically gets better' if we merely meditate. Meditation is important and especially crucial for awakening, but it is hardly the be-all and end-all solution to every issue in life. That kind of naive view easily becomes some kind of spiritual escapism or spiritual by-passing.
Tommy McNally, our admin, wrote: "Tommy McNally:
““I was a fucking mess for years. Last October, I made the decision to change that once and for all: I quit smoking cigarettes, quit SSRI's, and started getting up at 0500, exercising, and eating cleaner.
On the 26th of July this year, I started going to the gym for weightlifting and cardio. Yesterday was my 100th session.
The difference that exercise, a better diet and a consistent, non-negotiable routine makes - physically, mentally and spiritually - cannot be overstated.
I've never mentioned any of this publicly and I'm not posting this for kudos. I'm posting this because if I can do it, then so can you.”
- https://www.facebook.com/100055831473323/posts/326782622526118/ "
You said: "I tell them I'm good to go today. And I mean it... I don't think I'm depressed. "
Maybe low level depression and partly due to issues of identity as you described above. If you are truly suicidal (which based on what you expressed, you are not) then you will have to seek immediate professional help, but even if your 'depression' is a minor one, it can and should be dealt with, and spirituality can be part of (although not entirety of) the tools to improve your mental health. Lack of motivation is also a symptom of depression.
I often send this video to people suffering from depression. I am not a fan of Jordon Peterson, not in the sense that I am against Jordon Peterson but because I have not listened or read enough of his talks to form an opinion for/against him, although I am aware he is a somewhat controversial figure for other reasons. But I agree very much with his suggestions here on depression (and I am simply raising this video on the basis of his credentials as a licensed Clinical Psychologist, not on anything else: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VlDgowUAyx4 )
You said: " Really! I wish God could turn up the dial on happiness and turn down the dial on unhappiness... "
That is good. In Buddhism, the purpose of spiritual awakening is not only about happiness in this life and not just for oneself. In Buddhism, and I consider myself and many consider themselves Buddhists here, our aim is not just 'happiness in this life' but 'freedom from cyclic existence/samsaric cycle of rebirths' and for Mahayana practitioners, our aim is to attain Buddhahood for the benefit of all sentient beings.
John Tan, 2006: "Life is like a passing cloud, when it comes to an end, a hundred years is like yesterday, like a snap of a finger. If it is only about one life, it really doesn’t matter whether we are enlightened. The insight that the Blessed One has is not just about one life; countless lives we suffered, life after life, unending…Such is suffering.
It is not about logic or science and there is really no point arguing in this scientific age. Take steps in practice and experience the truth of Buddha’s words. Of the 3 dharma seals, the truth of ‘suffering’ to me is most difficult to experience in depth.
May all take Buddha’s words seriously."
Related: https://www.awakeningtoreality.com/2018/07/on-supernatural-powers-or-siddhis.html
Also see my comments below for more.
.....
Also, almost all who awakened through AtR (more than 60) are lay persons, they are not monastics, monks, nuns or hermits. They live lay life, have spouses and children and a livelihood in the secular world. And they awakened. All except one Theravada monk who lives in Indonesia and he awakened to anatta after contemplating on AtR pointers.
Thrangu Rinpoche said:
“The Mahamudra teachings are easy to practice – they are special and superior. If pupils wish to practice Vajrayana, they certainly have the aspiration to follow these teachings. During the times of Buddha Shakyamuni, devotees would spend their entire life practicing the teachings and would beg for their food instead of working for their living. During those times, one wealthy family would feed 1000, 2000, or even 3000 monks and supply them with their daily needs, so wealthy householders would accumulate merit by enabling monks to practice. This is not the custom anymore and begging is considered a bad way of earning one’s living nowadays. So people have to have a job and work for their living, which is good. Working does not stand in opposition to the Dharma, because it is possible to have a good job. Some people do experience a contradiction and think, “I am working and cannot practice the Dharma and when I practice meditation it is bad for my work.” What puts an end to this feeling? Mahamudra meditation. By practicing Mahamudra meditation and integrating one’s experiences in one’s life, working for one’s living does not stop one from practicing Dharma and practicing Dharma does not interfere with one’s job. So, Mahamudra is especially beneficial during these times. When I travel to America and Europe, I always give the Mahamudra teachings, because I feel that they are very beneficial for people living in these times.
There were 84 Mahasiddhas in India, who each lived a different kind of life. They gained accomplishments by practicing Mahamudra. King Indrabhuti, for example, was very wealthy; he ruled over an extensive kingdom and was involved with many activities that were necessary in order meet all his obligations. But his many duties did not stop him from practicing the Dharma, because he was practicing Mahamudra. He ruled while practicing Mahamudra and became a great Mahasiddha, an accomplished being. Nagarjuna was a great scholar who composed many texts; he used sharp logic and clear reasoning to refute erroneous ways. He wrote treatises that people could accept. Even if they didn’t totally agree, many people were different after they read his treatises, because they felt, “This is right. This is correct. This is how one should think.” Nagarjuna had many pupils and wrote many books, but teaching and writing were not obstacles to his practice, because he was practising Mahamudra. Tilopa made his living by grinding and pounding sesame seeds. He became a Mahasiddha by practising Mahamudra meditation while pounding the sesame seeds to win oil to pay for his living.
It doesn’t matter what kind of job one has – whether one works as a scholar or as a servant – one can practice Mahamudra. Whether one is a man or a woman, one can gain the result of Mahamudra meditation. I think it is a very beneficial practice and I want to give these teachings to you with this good intention. Sometimes I teach The Concise Words of Mahamudra by Naropa, or The Mahamudra Teachings Given along the Ganges River by Tilopa, or Moonbeams of Mahamudra by Dhagpo Tashi Namgyal. This time I will present the Mahamudra teachings according to “The Short Dorje Chang Lineage Prayer.” It is a very fortunate occasion to be able to teach this and it will be very beneficial to receive it, to practice it, and to gain benefits from it. I am very happy to give Mahamudra teachings at this time.”
Thrangu Rinpoche said:
“The Mahamudra teachings are easy to practice – they are special and superior. If pupils wish to practice Vajrayana, they certainly have the aspiration to follow these teachings. During the times of Buddha Shakyamuni, devotees would spend their entire life practicing the teachings and would beg for their food instead of working for their living. During those times, one wealthy family would feed 1000, 2000, or even 3000 monks and supply them with their daily needs, so wealthy householders would accumulate merit by enabling monks to practice. This is not the custom anymore and begging is considered a bad way of earning one’s living nowadays. So people have to have a job and work for their living, which is good. Working does not stand in opposition to the Dharma, because it is possible to have a good job. Some people do experience a contradiction and think, “I am working and cannot practice the Dharma and when I practice meditation it is bad for my work.” What puts an end to this feeling? Mahamudra meditation. By practicing Mahamudra meditation and integrating one’s experiences in one’s life, working for one’s living does not stop one from practicing Dharma and practicing Dharma does not interfere with one’s job. So, Mahamudra is especially beneficial during these times. When I travel to America and Europe, I always give the Mahamudra teachings, because I feel that they are very beneficial for people living in these times.
There were 84 Mahasiddhas in India, who each lived a different kind of life. They gained accomplishments by practicing Mahamudra. King Indrabhuti, for example, was very wealthy; he ruled over an extensive kingdom and was involved with many activities that were necessary in order meet all his obligations. But his many duties did not stop him from practicing the Dharma, because he was practicing Mahamudra. He ruled while practicing Mahamudra and became a great Mahasiddha, an accomplished being. Nagarjuna was a great scholar who composed many texts; he used sharp logic and clear reasoning to refute erroneous ways. He wrote treatises that people could accept. Even if they didn’t totally agree, many people were different after they read his treatises, because they felt, “This is right. This is correct. This is how one should think.” Nagarjuna had many pupils and wrote many books, but teaching and writing were not obstacles to his practice, because he was practising Mahamudra. Tilopa made his living by grinding and pounding sesame seeds. He became a Mahasiddha by practising Mahamudra meditation while pounding the sesame seeds to win oil to pay for his living.
It doesn’t matter what kind of job one has – whether one works as a scholar or as a servant – one can practice Mahamudra. Whether one is a man or a woman, one can gain the result of Mahamudra meditation. I think it is a very beneficial practice and I want to give these teachings to you with this good intention. Sometimes I teach The Concise Words of Mahamudra by Naropa, or The Mahamudra Teachings Given along the Ganges River by Tilopa, or Moonbeams of Mahamudra by Dhagpo Tashi Namgyal. This time I will present the Mahamudra teachings according to “The Short Dorje Chang Lineage Prayer.” It is a very fortunate occasion to be able to teach this and it will be very beneficial to receive it, to practice it, and to gain benefits from it. I am very happy to give Mahamudra teachings at this time.”
...
On compassion and bodhicitta, something I wrote elsewhere:
Since childhood, I have felt a deep connection to Avalokiteśvara Bodhisattva and Ārya Tārā, both embodiments of compassion. I cannot forget the dreams, miraculous visions, and encounters I've had with them, all carrying the message to practice compassion and help others. I am always moved when I think of the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas, not only for their teachings but also for their compassion. It is my sincere wish that all sentient beings be liberated from samsara. I also hope that everyone can embody the qualities of both compassion and wisdom.
In Buddhism, it is said that wisdom and compassion are like the two wings of a bird. A bird needs both wings to fly straight, and similarly, the path to the Middle Way (between the extremes of inherent existence and nothingness) requires the wings of wisdom and compassion. Wisdom prevents us from falling into the extreme of inherent existence by realizing the absence of inherentness, while compassion prevents us from falling into the extreme of nihilism by recognizing suffering and wishing for it to cease. When one actualizes their true nature, compassion naturally arises upon realizing that beings suffer due to not recognizing their true nature.
As John Tan said in 2014, 'After you have glimpses into twofold [emptiness], start to look into compassion. Take small steps at a time and start to understand what compassion means… like practicing anatta and emptiness. …You must have enough rest, stabilize twofold [emptiness], and develop your compassion and sense of reverence towards things step by step. It will bring you to a new height. I am having zero concern of anatta and twofold… it is so natural and relaxed, with added new sources of joyful energy, don’t know from where. Like a brilliant ball of light radiating with joyous flow of energy. …If self-sprung appearance is natural [state] and [is] liberating but lacks a reverent and compassionate heart, then you must practice metta [loving-kindness].'
It should however be understood that the traditional term, relative Bodhicitta in Mahayana and Vajrayana Buddhism also implies the aspiration and intention to attain Buddhahood (full awakening) for the benefit of all sentient beings, and is not merely the practice of compassion. Ultimate Bodhicitta is the insight into emptiness. Both are indispensable components on the path to full awakening (Buddhahood). As mentioned by Acarya Malcolm Smith:
First, one generates bodhicitta, the desire to liberate all sentient beings from samsara. This has two aspects, ultimate and relative. The relative aspect refers to the aspiration, and then practicing the six perfections. Ultimate bodhicitta means practicing śamatha and vipaśyanā.
One practices these two bodhicitta together, until one realizes emptiness. This is the first bodhisattva bhumi. One continues to practice, until the practice of vipaśyanā has eradicated all traces of affliction (desire, hatred, and ignorance). This happens conventionally, at the seventh bhumi. Ultimately, has eradicated all traces of grasping to personal and phenomena identity, and one attains the omniscience of buddhahood, this happens when one transitions from being a tenth stage bodhisattva to buddhahood. A buddha is a totally realized person. There is no other kind of totally or fully realized person.”
In Mahayana Buddhism, it is essential to give rise to Bodhicitta, the aspiration to attain Buddhahood for the sake of all beings, and to make the Bodhisattva vow to lead all sentient beings across to the shore of liberation. I appreciate Albert Hong’s response to someone who asked, ‘How can I get over knowing that all my loved ones may reincarnate for many lifetimes and suffer due to their ignorance? It's like watching your child touch the fire, burn, and not let go. I feel this for everyone, but it's even harder for my loved ones.' Albert replied, ‘You make a vow to create interdependent connections with all those beings whom you love and are connected with—through seeing, touching, feeling, smelling, etc. And by your hand, your personal mindstream alone, you will come back to help them cultivate virtuous minds and realize wisdom for their liberation. You also make the vow for yourself to develop the capacity to force continuity across lifetimes and to have the skillful means to respond according to their specific needs. You make the vow to do whatever is appropriate to help them. If you need to be a bridge, you are a bridge. If you need to be a toilet, you are a toilet. In any case, you make that vow, you aspire, and you make it the fuel for your practice—your bodhicitta. Liberation only matters because we can then have the free energy to help others. Make the vow.’
The Diamond Sutra also taught, “The Buddha said to Subhuti: “The bodhisattvas and mahasattvas should thus subdue their thoughts: All the different types of sentient beings, whether they are born from eggs, from wombs, from moisture, or by transformation; whether or not they have form; whether they have thoughts or no thoughts, or have neither thought nor non-thought, I will liberate them by leading them to nirvana without residue. When immeasurable, countless, infinite numbers of sentient beings have been liberated, in reality, no sentient beings have been liberated. Why is this so? Subhuti, if bodhisattvas abide in the notions of a self, a person, a sentient being, or a life span, they are not bodhisattvas.””
In Dzogchen, it is said that our basis, our nature, has the qualities of purity (i.e. emptiness), spontaneity (lhun grub, associated with luminous clarity), and compassion (thugs rje).
In my opinion, all three are equally important. To focus solely on emptiness while neglecting luminous clarity can lead to an intellectualized view of emptiness, or even nihilism. On the other hand, emphasizing luminous clarity without understanding emptiness can result in eternalist views, where luminosity is reified as an essence or substratum. Focusing on both emptiness and clarity but neglecting compassion, the spontaneous responsiveness of our nature, results in an incomplete realization of our nature in action. Conceiving of radiance apart from activities and manifestations reifies it as having self-nature, thus not fully penetrating its empty nature. Furthermore, if your being is not filled with spontaneous compassion, you miss out the heart. However, to focus on compassion without wisdom and clarity leads to what could be called foolish compassion—compassion without discernment. This is just my personal understanding, as I am not a Dzogchen teacher.
Since childhood, I have felt a deep connection to Avalokiteśvara Bodhisattva and Ārya Tārā, both embodiments of compassion. I cannot forget the dreams, miraculous visions, and encounters I've had with them, all carrying the message to practice compassion and help others. I am always moved when I think of the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas, not only for their teachings but also for their compassion. It is my sincere wish that all sentient beings be liberated from samsara. I also hope that everyone can embody the qualities of both compassion and wisdom.
In Buddhism, it is said that wisdom and compassion are like the two wings of a bird. A bird needs both wings to fly straight, and similarly, the path to the Middle Way (between the extremes of inherent existence and nothingness) requires the wings of wisdom and compassion. Wisdom prevents us from falling into the extreme of inherent existence by realizing the absence of inherentness, while compassion prevents us from falling into the extreme of nihilism by recognizing suffering and wishing for it to cease. When one actualizes their true nature, compassion naturally arises upon realizing that beings suffer due to not recognizing their true nature.
As John Tan said in 2014, 'After you have glimpses into twofold [emptiness], start to look into compassion. Take small steps at a time and start to understand what compassion means… like practicing anatta and emptiness. …You must have enough rest, stabilize twofold [emptiness], and develop your compassion and sense of reverence towards things step by step. It will bring you to a new height. I am having zero concern of anatta and twofold… it is so natural and relaxed, with added new sources of joyful energy, don’t know from where. Like a brilliant ball of light radiating with joyous flow of energy. …If self-sprung appearance is natural [state] and [is] liberating but lacks a reverent and compassionate heart, then you must practice metta [loving-kindness].'
It should however be understood that the traditional term, relative Bodhicitta in Mahayana and Vajrayana Buddhism also implies the aspiration and intention to attain Buddhahood (full awakening) for the benefit of all sentient beings, and is not merely the practice of compassion. Ultimate Bodhicitta is the insight into emptiness. Both are indispensable components on the path to full awakening (Buddhahood). As mentioned by Acarya Malcolm Smith:
First, one generates bodhicitta, the desire to liberate all sentient beings from samsara. This has two aspects, ultimate and relative. The relative aspect refers to the aspiration, and then practicing the six perfections. Ultimate bodhicitta means practicing śamatha and vipaśyanā.
One practices these two bodhicitta together, until one realizes emptiness. This is the first bodhisattva bhumi. One continues to practice, until the practice of vipaśyanā has eradicated all traces of affliction (desire, hatred, and ignorance). This happens conventionally, at the seventh bhumi. Ultimately, has eradicated all traces of grasping to personal and phenomena identity, and one attains the omniscience of buddhahood, this happens when one transitions from being a tenth stage bodhisattva to buddhahood. A buddha is a totally realized person. There is no other kind of totally or fully realized person.”
In Mahayana Buddhism, it is essential to give rise to Bodhicitta, the aspiration to attain Buddhahood for the sake of all beings, and to make the Bodhisattva vow to lead all sentient beings across to the shore of liberation. I appreciate Albert Hong’s response to someone who asked, ‘How can I get over knowing that all my loved ones may reincarnate for many lifetimes and suffer due to their ignorance? It's like watching your child touch the fire, burn, and not let go. I feel this for everyone, but it's even harder for my loved ones.' Albert replied, ‘You make a vow to create interdependent connections with all those beings whom you love and are connected with—through seeing, touching, feeling, smelling, etc. And by your hand, your personal mindstream alone, you will come back to help them cultivate virtuous minds and realize wisdom for their liberation. You also make the vow for yourself to develop the capacity to force continuity across lifetimes and to have the skillful means to respond according to their specific needs. You make the vow to do whatever is appropriate to help them. If you need to be a bridge, you are a bridge. If you need to be a toilet, you are a toilet. In any case, you make that vow, you aspire, and you make it the fuel for your practice—your bodhicitta. Liberation only matters because we can then have the free energy to help others. Make the vow.’
The Diamond Sutra also taught, “The Buddha said to Subhuti: “The bodhisattvas and mahasattvas should thus subdue their thoughts: All the different types of sentient beings, whether they are born from eggs, from wombs, from moisture, or by transformation; whether or not they have form; whether they have thoughts or no thoughts, or have neither thought nor non-thought, I will liberate them by leading them to nirvana without residue. When immeasurable, countless, infinite numbers of sentient beings have been liberated, in reality, no sentient beings have been liberated. Why is this so? Subhuti, if bodhisattvas abide in the notions of a self, a person, a sentient being, or a life span, they are not bodhisattvas.””
In Dzogchen, it is said that our basis, our nature, has the qualities of purity (i.e. emptiness), spontaneity (lhun grub, associated with luminous clarity), and compassion (thugs rje).
In my opinion, all three are equally important. To focus solely on emptiness while neglecting luminous clarity can lead to an intellectualized view of emptiness, or even nihilism. On the other hand, emphasizing luminous clarity without understanding emptiness can result in eternalist views, where luminosity is reified as an essence or substratum. Focusing on both emptiness and clarity but neglecting compassion, the spontaneous responsiveness of our nature, results in an incomplete realization of our nature in action. Conceiving of radiance apart from activities and manifestations reifies it as having self-nature, thus not fully penetrating its empty nature. Furthermore, if your being is not filled with spontaneous compassion, you miss out the heart. However, to focus on compassion without wisdom and clarity leads to what could be called foolish compassion—compassion without discernment. This is just my personal understanding, as I am not a Dzogchen teacher.
…
Andre A Pais shared:
PLACING ALL BEINGS IN SUCHNESS
A Bodhisattva should not train in the same way in which persons belonging to the vehicle of the arhats and Pratyekabuddas are trained. How then are the arhats and Pratyekabuddhas trained? They make up their minds that ‘one single self we shall tame, one single self we shall pacify, one single self we shall lead to final nirvana’
....A Bodhisattva should certainly not in such a way train himself. On the contrary, he should train himself thus: ‘My own self I will place into Suchness, and, so that all the world might be helped, I will also place all beings into Suchness, and I will lead to nirvana the whole immeasurable world of beings’.
~ The Perfection of Wisdom Sutra in 8,000 Verses
What is criticized here is not the validity of the realization of the arhats and pratyekabuddhas, but their limited scope. The Perfection of Wisdom in 25,000 verses compares the arhats and pratyekabuddhas to glow-worms, and the bodhisattvas to the sun.⁵⁷ Both have kindled the flame of enlightenment, but the formers’ light only illuminates their own immediate surroundings, whereas that of the latter can potentially light up the whole world.
~ Jan Westerhoff...
On the subject of rebirth, I just shared the other day something Sim Pern Chong wrote before, to showcase that not only the Buddha himself but countless practitioners since Buddha has recalled numberless past lives:
"Sim Pern Chong shared some of them in our group, and he has gone through the same phases of realizations (I AM, nondual, anatta and emptiness)...
https://www.awakeningtoreality.com/2018/07/on-supernatural-powers-or-siddhis.html
...Sim Pern Chong remembered many of his past lives in incredible details as he relived his past lives and not merely recalled vague scenes. He also knew how his current life wife, daughter, etc were related to him in his previous lives, also his daughter exhibits psychic ability even at a young age (John Tan commented the child seems just like the father). He actually was a Nyingma monk who practiced Dzogchen two lifetimes ago. I think he told me before about practicing in the Tibetan highlands overlooking vast expanse. This life, he got acquinted with Chogyal Namkhai Norbu Rinpoche again in 2012 when I told him to join me for that retreat. But it explains his interest in Dzogchen even way back in maybe early 2000s.
Being a Tibetan monk in that lifetime, that means he surely had taken refuge, made bodhicitta aspiration etc in his previous life. But that didn't mean he could attain liberation in that lifetime, as most people do not. Nor did he realise anatta or emptiness or attain first bhumi, etc. In fact he remember that he only attained the I AM realization in his Tibetan monk lifetime, which was the first life he was into spirituality (the previous lifetimes before that had events leading up or causing his spiritual search in subsequent life but I shall digress).
In the immediate past life, he did not encounter Buddhism but was reborn in western Europe, I believe France. He was fighting in world war 1 in the trenches in a scene which he relived, meaning it was incredibly real and vividly experienced as if he was 'there' again, and in that scene he could recall running across trenches, pausing for a while and thinking of his wife (I think), a sad scene. This caused some trauma for him and explained his anxieties about war in this life, and his past life recall helped solve his traumas. In that lifetime, he also realised I AM only and was involved in mysticism, which explained his current lifetime links with the mystical groups prior to meeting John Tan.
Having I AM realization does not ensure some kind of mastery of rebirth or something like that. It is not even the first bhumi. That being said, Sim Pern Chong did recall some subconscious level (which he call 'Alaya') planning or blueprint of rebirth prior to appearing in this life. I actually had that sort of impression before, a brief one, of the spiritual purpose of my incarnation, as if there was some kind of plan or purpose. But I certainly am not a conscious emanation of some high level being, flawless, that was enlightened from birth.
This life, he came to know John Tan through an internet forum in 2004 and realised anatta and emptiness.
Malcolm said those who encounter Dzogchen teachings have had past life karmic connections with the teachings. Most practitioners that do their due diligence will attain liberation at the bardo. The very "lousy" ones will attain liberation within three lifetimes, so it does not mean you know Dzogchen then that means we are 'advanced' or special. It means we are the most lousy practitioners and didn't get liberated in the bardo or attain rainbow body in the previous life. Maybe we all had such links from previous lifetimes.
(2024 Update by Soh:
Sim shared: For the benefit of whoever is reading this.. i share my personal experiences of relive past live occurrences.
In a previous life, I adopt a stray dog as a young boy. Then WW1 broke out and i got conscripted as infantry soldier. Dog at home died due to no care. In this life, dog becomes someone that i have to take care of. This is how karma works. It doesn't really take into account that i was forced to leave in a drafted war.
In another ancient life, i am in a group of medical trainee. A captured or slave woman.. i really dunno.. i just watch the scene as a first person... was disected alive. In this life, this woman becomes someone that i have endure hardship with. This is karma... and it again did not take into account that the trainees where forced to perform the dissection.
Those that use mouth to direct the orders.. they do not incurr the direct karma of the 'hands-on' task of the subordinates. This is how dark forces manipulate karma for god know how long.. possibly even before there were modern day humans.
These are not well articulated in traditional religious text.. because i believe many 'teachers' do not really go deep into the alaya. Most 'teachers' are just parroting 'teachings'. Realising no-self can be experienced in the sense sphere.. the alaya is a different kind of penetration .. it is penetration into the unseen realms of consciousness. Nothing beats the knowledge from direct perception.
... Hmm.. i really dunno. My approach is just a fine balancing act between finding insights and yet keeping the mind open minded. That is how i progressed.
On a certain level, the knowledge of these are already there.. it is just blocked from the regular attention. I am at times also frustrated that the full awareness is not available. As a side note, i have been rebuked by a Being conveyed through a very wierd encounter where someone called me and then suddenly says his mentoring spirit guide wants to talk to me. And then the spirit guide took over the other guy and tell me how much i have forgotten and need to recover fuller memories.
I think Achan Brahm has direct understanding of this area.. but he is kept by samaya to not reveal any psychic ability. I saw in one of his recent video that he mentioned that he is frustrated by not being able to talk about past lives of his own.) note: Achan Brahm = Ajahn Brahmavamso
(Another update, 2024: Sim Pern Chong shared also, “ Sound also may seem to have a finer counterpart..
I also hv bleed thru of other live..That is why i post alot about wars.. eg ukraine-russia conflict. End of last year, tracing unknown anxiety, i literally relive a seemingly medival setting where i was a defender n then the 'enemies' rushed forward..but instead of seeing able-bodied combatants. all i saw were old and crippled men.. This is the cause of the anxiety...what shld i do? Strike them ..but my conscience say otherwise. This is the cause of anxiety..dunno what to do next. Next moment, the main enemy force comes from our side...fast and furious. End of vision.
What frustrates me..is that thousand year latter, the same tactic n shit is still being used in ukraine-russia conflict. The fact that nothing has changed tells that samsara is hopeless..”)
"Sim Pern Chong shared some of them in our group, and he has gone through the same phases of realizations (I AM, nondual, anatta and emptiness)...
https://www.awakeningtoreality.com/2018/07/on-supernatural-powers-or-siddhis.html
...Sim Pern Chong remembered many of his past lives in incredible details as he relived his past lives and not merely recalled vague scenes. He also knew how his current life wife, daughter, etc were related to him in his previous lives, also his daughter exhibits psychic ability even at a young age (John Tan commented the child seems just like the father). He actually was a Nyingma monk who practiced Dzogchen two lifetimes ago. I think he told me before about practicing in the Tibetan highlands overlooking vast expanse. This life, he got acquinted with Chogyal Namkhai Norbu Rinpoche again in 2012 when I told him to join me for that retreat. But it explains his interest in Dzogchen even way back in maybe early 2000s.
Being a Tibetan monk in that lifetime, that means he surely had taken refuge, made bodhicitta aspiration etc in his previous life. But that didn't mean he could attain liberation in that lifetime, as most people do not. Nor did he realise anatta or emptiness or attain first bhumi, etc. In fact he remember that he only attained the I AM realization in his Tibetan monk lifetime, which was the first life he was into spirituality (the previous lifetimes before that had events leading up or causing his spiritual search in subsequent life but I shall digress).
In the immediate past life, he did not encounter Buddhism but was reborn in western Europe, I believe France. He was fighting in world war 1 in the trenches in a scene which he relived, meaning it was incredibly real and vividly experienced as if he was 'there' again, and in that scene he could recall running across trenches, pausing for a while and thinking of his wife (I think), a sad scene. This caused some trauma for him and explained his anxieties about war in this life, and his past life recall helped solve his traumas. In that lifetime, he also realised I AM only and was involved in mysticism, which explained his current lifetime links with the mystical groups prior to meeting John Tan.
Having I AM realization does not ensure some kind of mastery of rebirth or something like that. It is not even the first bhumi. That being said, Sim Pern Chong did recall some subconscious level (which he call 'Alaya') planning or blueprint of rebirth prior to appearing in this life. I actually had that sort of impression before, a brief one, of the spiritual purpose of my incarnation, as if there was some kind of plan or purpose. But I certainly am not a conscious emanation of some high level being, flawless, that was enlightened from birth.
This life, he came to know John Tan through an internet forum in 2004 and realised anatta and emptiness.
Malcolm said those who encounter Dzogchen teachings have had past life karmic connections with the teachings. Most practitioners that do their due diligence will attain liberation at the bardo. The very "lousy" ones will attain liberation within three lifetimes, so it does not mean you know Dzogchen then that means we are 'advanced' or special. It means we are the most lousy practitioners and didn't get liberated in the bardo or attain rainbow body in the previous life. Maybe we all had such links from previous lifetimes.
(2024 Update by Soh:
Sim shared: For the benefit of whoever is reading this.. i share my personal experiences of relive past live occurrences.
In a previous life, I adopt a stray dog as a young boy. Then WW1 broke out and i got conscripted as infantry soldier. Dog at home died due to no care. In this life, dog becomes someone that i have to take care of. This is how karma works. It doesn't really take into account that i was forced to leave in a drafted war.
In another ancient life, i am in a group of medical trainee. A captured or slave woman.. i really dunno.. i just watch the scene as a first person... was disected alive. In this life, this woman becomes someone that i have endure hardship with. This is karma... and it again did not take into account that the trainees where forced to perform the dissection.
Those that use mouth to direct the orders.. they do not incurr the direct karma of the 'hands-on' task of the subordinates. This is how dark forces manipulate karma for god know how long.. possibly even before there were modern day humans.
These are not well articulated in traditional religious text.. because i believe many 'teachers' do not really go deep into the alaya. Most 'teachers' are just parroting 'teachings'. Realising no-self can be experienced in the sense sphere.. the alaya is a different kind of penetration .. it is penetration into the unseen realms of consciousness. Nothing beats the knowledge from direct perception.
... Hmm.. i really dunno. My approach is just a fine balancing act between finding insights and yet keeping the mind open minded. That is how i progressed.
On a certain level, the knowledge of these are already there.. it is just blocked from the regular attention. I am at times also frustrated that the full awareness is not available. As a side note, i have been rebuked by a Being conveyed through a very wierd encounter where someone called me and then suddenly says his mentoring spirit guide wants to talk to me. And then the spirit guide took over the other guy and tell me how much i have forgotten and need to recover fuller memories.
I think Achan Brahm has direct understanding of this area.. but he is kept by samaya to not reveal any psychic ability. I saw in one of his recent video that he mentioned that he is frustrated by not being able to talk about past lives of his own.) note: Achan Brahm = Ajahn Brahmavamso
(Another update, 2024: Sim Pern Chong shared also, “ Sound also may seem to have a finer counterpart..
I also hv bleed thru of other live..That is why i post alot about wars.. eg ukraine-russia conflict. End of last year, tracing unknown anxiety, i literally relive a seemingly medival setting where i was a defender n then the 'enemies' rushed forward..but instead of seeing able-bodied combatants. all i saw were old and crippled men.. This is the cause of the anxiety...what shld i do? Strike them ..but my conscience say otherwise. This is the cause of anxiety..dunno what to do next. Next moment, the main enemy force comes from our side...fast and furious. End of vision.
What frustrates me..is that thousand year latter, the same tactic n shit is still being used in ukraine-russia conflict. The fact that nothing has changed tells that samsara is hopeless..”)
...
-----
daniel ingram:
“
As to world-cycles or the like, my past life experiences line up along the following lines, if you believe in such experiences having validity:
1) This life human.
2) Last life some sort of moderately powerful, clearly somewhat debauched male jealous god/sorcerer of some kind that was stabbed in the back with a dagger by a woman who he had wronged in some way, I think.
3) Some sort of mother skunk-like animal that was eaten by a large black dog or wolf.
4) Some sort of mother bat that was killed when the rock it was clinging to at the top of the cave fell to the floor.
5) Some sort of grim, gigantic, armored skeletal titan-like thing that ran tirelessly through space swinging a gigantic sword and doing battle nearly continuously without sleep for hundreds of thousands of years that was killed by something like a dragon.
6) Some gigantic, gelatinous, multi-tentacled, very alien being living in a very dark place for a very long time, probably under water, I think.
Other than some sense that the skunk-thing and the bat-thing were virtuous mothers, I have no sense that there was any profound previous dharmic development at least back that far, and, in fact, have the distinct sense that the previous one was a bit of a cad and not very ethical. Take that all for what you will.”
Daniel"
daniel ingram:
“
As to world-cycles or the like, my past life experiences line up along the following lines, if you believe in such experiences having validity:
1) This life human.
2) Last life some sort of moderately powerful, clearly somewhat debauched male jealous god/sorcerer of some kind that was stabbed in the back with a dagger by a woman who he had wronged in some way, I think.
3) Some sort of mother skunk-like animal that was eaten by a large black dog or wolf.
4) Some sort of mother bat that was killed when the rock it was clinging to at the top of the cave fell to the floor.
5) Some sort of grim, gigantic, armored skeletal titan-like thing that ran tirelessly through space swinging a gigantic sword and doing battle nearly continuously without sleep for hundreds of thousands of years that was killed by something like a dragon.
6) Some gigantic, gelatinous, multi-tentacled, very alien being living in a very dark place for a very long time, probably under water, I think.
Other than some sense that the skunk-thing and the bat-thing were virtuous mothers, I have no sense that there was any profound previous dharmic development at least back that far, and, in fact, have the distinct sense that the previous one was a bit of a cad and not very ethical. Take that all for what you will.”
Daniel"
—-
Also, I agree with ChatGPT’s advise here:
“I’m really sorry to hear about your friend’s struggles. Based on what they’ve shared, therapy may indeed be more effective than meditation in addressing their current challenges. Here’s why:
1. Understanding the Issues:
Your friend is experiencing complex feelings, including thoughts about not wanting to be alive, detachment from others, and difficulties forming meaningful relationships. These feelings can be multifaceted and may stem from various underlying factors such as past experiences, personality traits, or unaddressed emotional needs.
2. Benefits of Therapy:
• Professional Guidance: A licensed therapist can help your friend explore and understand the root causes of their feelings. Through techniques like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), they can work on changing negative thought patterns.
• Emotional Support: Therapy provides a safe space to express and process emotions, which can be particularly beneficial for someone feeling detached or isolated.
• Developing Coping Strategies: Therapists can equip your friend with tools to manage distressing thoughts and improve their overall mental well-being.
• Addressing Specific Issues: If there are underlying issues such as anxiety, existential concerns, or relationship difficulties, therapy can target these areas directly.
3. Role of Meditation:
• Complementary Practice: While meditation can enhance mindfulness, reduce stress, and improve emotional regulation, it may not address deeper psychological issues on its own.
• Building a Practice: Given your friend’s mention of struggling to develop a consistent meditation practice, therapy might help them explore barriers to mindfulness and find more sustainable ways to integrate it into their life.
4. Social Connection:
• Therapeutic Relationships: Building a trusting relationship with a therapist can help counter feelings of detachment and provide a sense of connection.
• Support Networks: Therapists can also guide your friend in developing healthier relationships and improving social interactions.
5. Safety Considerations:
• Addressing Suicidal Thoughts: Even if your friend doesn’t identify as depressed, expressing thoughts like “I’d much rather be dead” is serious and warrants professional attention to ensure their safety and well-being.
Recommendation:
Encourage your friend to reach out to a mental health professional. Therapy can provide personalized support tailored to their unique experiences and needs. Additionally, integrating meditation as a complementary practice within a therapeutic framework might enhance their overall progress.
Supporting Your Friend:
• Listen and Validate: Let them know you care and are there to support them without judgment.
• Encourage Professional Help: Gently suggest seeking therapy and offer to help them find resources if they’re open to it.
• Stay Connected: Regular check-ins can make a significant difference in how supported they feel.
Remember, while meditation has its benefits, the complexity of your friend’s feelings and experiences suggests that professional therapy would likely be more effective in addressing their current struggles.”
