Ahaha yeah see that’s my difficulty right there, but that’s on the functionality routine list

Exercise, yoga, meditation, dream journaling

The thing is that learning about anatta and understanding it really helps ease off the feeling of things falling down on some sort of “me”, like it lifts the weight significantly

But I’ll admit that I’ve had thoughts of just getting away to somewhere where I’m allowed to focus on these teachings more, or just spirituality in general

Without any further pressures or distraction

The USA has a very intense culture in regards to trying to real make a solid, permanent, almost “immortal” self whether through your family or on the world. Like you have to “make a name for yourself” to be valuable

And you can’t seem to really suggest to people that maybe that’s not necessary to live a happy, healthy life. It’s like we get caught up in this very deep, delusional dream of extremes that makes it hard for those of us attempting to walk this sort of path of philosophy/spirituality more difficult

We are a very “try hard” culture in regards to really solidifying an ego to be proud of. It’s exhausting hahaha

Sorry to get heavy in that regard, what’s your take on this though?


i have more to say later but im going out, but you do intend to live a normal lay life instead of a celibate monastic life, right?


i was just telling someone days ago

“STUDENT: How do we know the difference between a rigpa likeness and the true rigpa?
RINPOCHE: Through experiencing the authentic rigpa. Imagine that you are someone who has never seen an apple in your whole life, although you’ve been told about it. People have made drawings of apples and explained to you what they look like, their round shape, how thin the skin is, and what it tastes like — it’s sweet and juicy and so forth. But you haven’t seen one or tasted one yet. Then one day you see a display of fruit that includes some apples, and you look at it and think, “Hmm, this looks like the apple that they’ve talked about.” You take it and you put it in your mouth, you bite and you taste and swallow. You think, “Yes, this is exactly what they told me about. Now I know.”
It’s like that. If someone then says, “This is an apple” and points to an orange, you won’t believe them, because you’ve tasted the real thing. In the same way, first we hear about rigpa, then we think about it, and then we meditate. At some point we experience with certainty how it really is. There is no other way to do this. One way of understanding it is conceptual; the other is free of concepts. If you haven’t tasted the absence of concepts, you can hear about or understand what it’s like, but you still haven’t experienced the real thing. First we need to recognize and resolve on one point. With the resolution, one feels really sure.
Right now you’re hearing a lot of talk about the qualities and characteristics of rigpa. But when it becomes part of your own experience, you know. For that to happen, you need to train day and night, like Milarepa, to the point where your buttocks become callused from sitting so much. Train further and further until realization dawns within your stream of being.
Nowadays you don’t have to sit on bare rock like Milarepa — it’s really all right to sit on a comfortable seat. Likewise, you no longer have to make your own food — you can hire a servant to cook for you. But you need to save up some money first, when you are young. If you want to do good practice, you need a yogi credit card! In the past you could beg and people would support religious practitioners,

but nowadays it’s not so easy. In the past people were happy with simple food; nowadays they need rich food. And when you go to a big shopping center, there are so many things. There is a lot of stuff we don’t even know about, and we have to decide what to pick. We don’t buy just one or two things; we need to be completely stocked up with a lot of items. That all takes money.
First you need to accumulate some wealth when you are young. When you have the money, you can practice Dharma. I’m not joking! Honestly, without money we can’t really practice, because there is no time, we have to go to work everyday. Of course, if you get a good sponsor, it is better. We need to be a little intelligent about how we use our life. It’s not a good idea to totally occupy ourselves with Dharma, and find that after a while we haven’t gotten anywhere with spiritual practice, and we don’t have any career either. We need to be skillful and think ahead. Otherwise, when we are fifty or so, we start to panic. “I have no money, what should I do now? I’m getting old, and I must practice, I must meditate. But I’ve no money.” Think well about this while you are young. It’s good to practice, of course, but we need to think from both sides. Dharma doesn’t only mean religion, it means something that you can depend on, something that can help you throughout your entire life. So, work to improve your life — not merely this life but throughout the future as well. When we say ‘life,’ it doesn’t just mean being alive in this body, but rather the continuation of mind which moves from incarnation to incarnation. That is what life really is.
In Tibet, although there were four schools of Buddhism, they didn’t use the word ‘religion.’ That was applied only after Tibetans came down to Nepal and India. Instead, they used a word for the ‘way of Dharma,’ chölug, which carries the sense of what is real, what is true, what is genuine, what is ultimately beneficial, both now and in the long run. The meaning is more referring to something that is in tune with how things really are, something that is helpful, that can improve us. So chölug means ‘spiritual way of life’ — not a confused or deluded life, but a way of being genuine and true. That is what we train ourselves in. We should be without any confusion about how we approach this, how we involve ourselves in spirituality, for this entire life.
In any case, be happy. Don’t entertain a lot of pointless worries, repeating the same words over and over again in your mind. Alot of our thoughts are repetitions, 30 or 35 times the same thought. And we play and replay the same ten themes: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. Then we start all over again, thinking about the same ten things again. It doesn’t actually help that much, does it? If you could have something different to worry about — say, the eleventh, twelfth and thirteenth things — it would be a little more interesting! But if it’s the same ten things over and over again, it’s just habit. We are caught up in the same habits, the same re-making of karma, the same way of deluding ourselves. All this makes our

minds the opposite of open. Don’t be like that. Be clever about yourself. Smile, and continue practicing. You don’t have to show your teeth while smiling; smile from within, with a nice radiance.
Right now we have very a good opportunity. Even though it may seem a little crowded and stuffy in this room, there is a reason for why we sit down together and practice. Yes, it can be boring, but sitting down and being bored can also be quite a good foundation for progress.”



Also i like this passage from the same book:

No matter how long ego-clinging and obscurations, Negative karma and disturbing emotions,
Have covered our nature,
They are totally gone in that one instant
Of genuinely recognizing the naked state of dharmakaya, Rigpa in actuality.
Once you have some training in this,
And if at the moment of death you recognize naked awareness, This body is discarded like a snake shedding its skin,
And you are liberated.
Do you understand about ground, path and fruition? Do you understand what is
meant by path? What is path? It’s okay to repeat what I said before. STUDENT: Path is confusion.
RINPOCHE: What’s the way to clear up this confusion? How many ways are there to clear up confusion?
STUDENT: Training. Meditation training. Conduct.
RINPOCHE: And? I mentioned these steps. Repeat them. It’s okay. STUDENT: Confidence.
RINPOCHE: Where does confidence come from?

STUDENT: From within.
RINPOCHE: How? From within what? From within the house?
STUDENT: From freedom.
RINPOCHE: Where does the freedom come from? Does it come from being confused? Does it come from being without confusion?
STUDENT: From seeing one’s own nature. RINPOCHE: Right. How is this nature? STUDENT: It is rigpa.
RINPOCHE: What is rigpa?
STUDENT: Self-existing awareness.
RINPOCHE: What is self-existing awareness? It has three qualities. What are those three?
STUDENT: Empty, cognizant, and endowed with capacity. RINPOCHE: Is there any sequence in those three? STUDENT: No there is no sequence.
RINPOCHE: When I talk about them I seem to talk about them one after another. Why is that? What is meant by empty essence? What does the emptiness feel like when experiencing? I mentioned before no center, no edge. What was the second?
STUDENT: Cognizant nature.
RINPOCHE: What is that like? Just use baby talk, normal words.
STUDENT: All five sense doors wide are open, and everything is clearly known.
RINPOCHE: Knowing what? Knowing that the five senses are wide open, or knowing what? Knowing that the consciousness is clear, awake? Knowing what?
STUDENT: Knowing that there is no subject.
RINPOCHE: It sounds good. The words sound good. The third quality, what’s the

STUDENT: Unimpeded.
RINPOCHE: What does that mean?
STUDENT: All appearances, perceptions, and experiences are unimpeded.
RINPOCHE: What’s the connection between this unimpededness and the first two qualities? Is there a connection?
STUDENT: The emptiness and the cognizance are united. RINPOCHE: And how does that feel like?
STUDENT: Anything can arise.
RINPOCHE: What does that feel like in experience? Actually, there is no separate third quality. It’s simply the unity of the first two, because the first two are indivisible. That indivisibility is described as a third quality, but it’s not something separate at all. Honestly, the third is not a third. In fact, there are no two either. All three are simply one quality. What is that called?
STUDENT: Panoramic awareness, like wide-screen awareness.
RINPOCHE: Could you come up with a Tibetan word for it?
STUDENT: I don’t know Tibetan.
TRANSLATOR: I believe we have used one particular Tibetan word quite a lot. STUDENT: Rigpa.
RINPOCHE: Rigpa is good enough. You’re not to blame if you don’t know Tibetan and you’re new to this. How many qualities does rigpa have? It’s all right to say the three qualities just mentioned. [Laughter.] What about these three qualities? In the moment of recognizing, do we recognize them one by one, or what?
RINPOCHE: But in terms of time? STUDENT: Simultaneously.

RINPOCHE: That’s true. That’s what we should know. When the three qualities are present simultaneously, at once, that can be called rigpa. Do you understand this? They are present at the same time, which is not really a time, but we can call it timelessness. Really, it’s timeless time. It can be called by another word also.
RINPOCHE: View of what? Or by what? What knows this view? Rigpa knows. What is rigpa? Rigpa is something that has three qualities. Knowing these three qualities at once simultaneously is called rigpa. That we can also call the view. The view is used in all the different vehicles. But what is the Dzogchen view? The view in Dzogchen is rigpa, which is the simultaneous knowing that your essence is empty, your nature is cognizant, and your capacity is unconfined. Do you understand this? Is this clear? So, what is the training or meditation?
STUDENT: Sustaining the continuity. RINPOCHE: What needs to be sustained? STUDENT: Unfabricated naturalness. RINPOCHE: What is that?
STUDENT: Thought-free.
RINPOCHE: What’s that? What about rigpa? Wouldn’t it be okay to sustain rigpa? Don’t you like the word sustain?
STUDENT: It seems like there is some effort in sustaining. RINPOCHE: What about effortless sustaining? Would that be okay? STUDENT: Yes, that’s okay.
RINPOCHE: The continuity of that needs to be sustained. This is the continuity.
(Rinpoche rings the bell.)
First, by some effort, there’s a hitting together. There’s sound. That means you’ve arrived in rigpa. The three qualities are continually present, and that is called sustaining. After all, you have to use some word to describe it. That sustaining is what we call meditation. (Rinpoche rings the bell again.)
After hitting you, leave it. Right? You’re not continuing to keep, you’re not holding on, right? This is the sustaining of the undistracted nonmeditation. Now,

what is meant by conduct, or putting to use? Earlier I mentioned view, meditation and conduct, quite a few times. What do you understand by conduct? When is it needed? What is it?
STUDENT: Post-meditation.
RINPOCHE: Can somebody else answer? You don’t have to say more than two words, really, but if you need to, say as much as you want to say.
STUDENT: As soon as one is distracted, to arrive back in awareness effortlessly.
RINPOCHE: That sounds really good. If you can arrive back in rigpa without effort, that’s first-class. I didn’t expect that much. If you said something like, “To deliberately remind yourself to arrive back in rigpa,” that would be good enough. Even that would be first-class. But someone training in the way that you expressed means that you’re almost at the point of stability in rigpa. All objects of distraction have dissolved into the innate nature

Also.. was reminded of an old conversation

Session Start: Friday, 9 November, 2007

(5:41 PM) AEN: back
(5:41 PM) Thusness:, this is the thread. :)
(5:41 PM) Thusness: read what longchen wrote also.
(5:42 PM) AEN: okie
(5:47 PM) Thusness has changed his/her status to Idle
(7:36 PM) Thusness: going to complete my project and wait for answer next year. :P
(7:36 PM) Thusness: hope everything goes well and smooth
(8:22 PM) AEN: back
(8:23 PM) AEN: oic..
(9:26 PM) AEN: btw longchen said some jobs require alot of effort or grasping to be done well. when he try to completely let go or degrasp, things may not be done that well.. so his job performance may be affected
(9:26 PM) AEN: tats also y he wanna change job
(10:00 PM) Thusness: he should spent more quality hours in meditation...
(10:01 PM) Thusness: its okie to grasp and do well for his job even though the sense of self arise
(10:01 PM) AEN: oic how come
(10:01 PM) AEN: y shld he spend more hours in mediation and y sense of self arise is ok?
(10:02 PM) Thusness: because that is a form of practice
(10:02 PM) AEN: what is a form of practice?
(10:03 PM) Thusness: his job.
(10:03 PM) Thusness: however if it takes up even the quality hours for practice, then he must consider changing job. :)
(10:03 PM) AEN: u mean if no time to meditate, change job?
(10:04 PM) Thusness: yes. :)
(10:04 PM) AEN: icic..
(10:05 PM) Thusness: even when one experiences non-duality, when situation where conditions are strong for dualism to take place, non-dualists face problem too.
(10:06 PM) Thusness: and the situation really present itself as a good opportunity for practice.
(10:06 PM) AEN: oic..
(10:06 PM) Thusness: there will be a lot of grasping and spending quality hours in meditation is important
(10:07 PM) Thusness: the grasping will create the strong contrast when one sits especially for non-dualists becauses the pathless is already seen.
(10:07 PM) AEN: oic..
(10:07 PM) AEN: y pathless is seen then create strong contrast?
(10:08 PM) Thusness: but if the job nature is too unreasonable, then he should change for a better job but not so much for spirituality.
(10:09 PM) Thusness: when the pathless is seen, he already know the 'how' of directly experiencing our buddha nature
(10:09 PM) Thusness: just that when condition becomes harsh, the sense of self arises and throws one out of non-dual and force us to think dualistically to react
(10:10 PM) Thusness: but that is rather the result of a lack of strength in practice
(10:10 PM) AEN: oic..
(10:11 PM) Thusness: but until a certain stage, he should look for a job that allows him to have more time to experience the deeper clarity and luminosity aspect
(10:11 PM) Thusness: especially once the emptiness nature is clearly seen
(10:11 PM) AEN: icic..
(10:12 PM) Thusness: one should feel the most of each moment of sensation
(10:12 PM) Thusness: as if each moment is the crux of experience
(10:12 PM) AEN: oic..

also john tan said before, don't need to go for multi million dollar strive... just have a basic salary that is sufficient for survival is good enough

but he himself is a very successful businessman

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