Sharing Pam's experience as I mentioned in my previous post. Previously Pam had the I AM realization up to one mind earlier this year, and many peak experiences of nonduality and mind-body drop in meditation. But a breakthrough insight made these her natural state now as the obscuring view of a background Self is penetrated and the true nature of mind reveals itself.

[27/8/18, 5:22:49 PM] Pam: Btw I penetrated another level.
[27/8/18, 6:28:38 PM] Soh Wei Yu: Cool
[27/8/18, 6:28:41 PM] Soh Wei Yu: What level?
[27/8/18, 8:14:11 PM] Pam: Just came out of Crazy Rich Asians movie.
[27/8/18, 8:14:27 PM] Pam: I recorded in my memo:
‎[27/8/18, 8:15:13 PM] Pam: ‎"25 Aug 2018
Read Kiloby last night on investigating the lack of boundary in field of perception. Upon waking, it cracked open. The room is one whole seamless seeing. No division. No here no there no me centre. This shift carries over the whole day everywhere I look.

26 Aug 2018
Upon waking and contemplating IT IS ALWAYS NOW, the mind suddenly got out of the way and there it is! Oh! This is what they are talking about! Just this happening. This sight this sound this moment. Now. Now. Now. Every moment actualizes out of itself, magical, vivid, pulsing with life. Such peace. Such joy. Nothing seems to matter. Just this lifeing instance, as it is.

27 Aug 2018
Read UG Krish last night. Upon waking same experience as his description. Only sense contact points of body with bed. No other parts of body exists.

[27/8/18, 8:21:17 PM] Pam: Haha think can't claim as 'level' la. But certainly a big thing for me, going by the amount of peace experienced.
[27/8/18, 8:38:16 PM] Pam: I was so damned sick of hearing 'everything is as it is' over and over again, because I could not get it. Now I do.

[27/8/18, 8:39:12 PM] Pam: Either you see it or you don't. You won't see it till you do!


[28/8/18, 6:59:46 PM] Pam: Just not that long ago I had similar ignorance about an unchanging ultimate background
[28/8/18, 7:00:04 PM] Pam: Was stuck in Advaita's Brahman.
[28/8/18, 7:23:42 PM] Pam: So, awareness is not other than foreground activity. They co-arise and then leave no trace upon falling away.
[28/8/18, 7:56:52 PM] Pam: Actually I find transience and emptiness freeing. Magical while phenomena last, and upon dissolution it is finished business. But most minds fear this and need to grasp onto something absolute and permanent.
[28/8/18, 7:57:53 PM] Pam: Now listening to Daniel Ingram's podcast Mastering the Core Teachings of the Buddha
[28/8/18, 7:58:46 PM] Soh Wei Yu: 👍
[28/8/18, 8:34:28 PM] Soh Wei Yu: Would you say that it is very clear now that in seeing just the seen and awareness as manifestation and all agency are seen through like Daniel description of fourth path?
[28/8/18, 8:34:57 PM] Pam: Yes very clear
[28/8/18, 8:35:13 PM] Pam: My depression is gone
[28/8/18, 8:35:21 PM] Soh Wei Yu: Wow nice
[28/8/18, 8:35:26 PM] Pam: I feel very peaceful

[28/8/18, 8:42:46 PM] Pam: It is just seeing. Not the seen as object. The 'object' is made of seeing alone. There is no object.
[28/8/18, 8:44:11 PM] Pam: sounds = hearing alone
thought = thinking alone
[28/8/18, 8:44:54 PM] Soh Wei Yu: But should also see that there is no seeing besides seen
[28/8/18, 8:45:04 PM] Soh Wei Yu: Otherwise seeing becomes unchanging and inherent
[28/8/18, 8:46:11 PM] Pam: me the seeing is changing
[28/8/18, 8:47:09 PM] Soh Wei Yu: Yes so no seeing besides colors, no hearing besides sound yes?
[28/8/18, 8:47:44 PM] Pam: yes just colours, not object PLUS colour
[28/8/18, 8:58:27 PM] Soh Wei Yu: 👍

[29/8/18, 11:58:24 AM] Pam: Anyway, here is what it is like ever since few days ago, upon waking:
‎[29/8/18, 12:00:06 PM] Pam: 28 Aug 2018
Like a blind person who suddenly sees. Repeatedly saying in my head "OMG IT'S LIKE THIS"

Everything in room stay where they are except they are now jumping with aliveness. Sight, sound, touch sensations heightened as if all my sense doors have open nerve ends. Totally melting into intimacy, merging with whatever is happening. I am these sounds, these colours, the air brushing my skin. OMG this is what people have been talking about. There is 100% certainty that I have broken through.

Feeling of gratitude, compassion, completion and a great understanding.

No desire to move or do anything but to stay still and soak in this presence. Nothing to seek nothing to hold onto. For the first time in my life I feel zero tension in body, free, serene and at home with myself.

[29/8/18, 1:48:40 PM] Soh Wei Yu: Btw what triggered your I AM realization previously? My Friend asked
[29/8/18, 2:17:58 PM] Pam: The first opening I had was while sewing and listening to a satsang. One line by the teacher just opened up a crack into a glimpse of oneness.
‎[29/8/18, 2:29:28 PM] Pam: 13-16 Jan 2018 Chiangmai
read The Untethered Soul

24 Jan 2018
Flash of no self, floating in timeless presencing merging into ONENESS while handstitching dark grey hem and listening to Rodriguez's line: Consciousness is closer than intimacy. Felt total bliss
2 Responses
  1. Anonymous Says:

    Thank you SOH for valuable insights.

    There's one thing that I don't understand : "In Seeing, just the seen". It seems that Pam or you say that it means "to see just the colors" ?
    In Satipatthana (excuse me for the terms) "… when urinating & defecating… , he makes himself fully alert". If one sees only colors, it will be very difficult to keep the toilet clean ;-)

    Can you explain more what really means "in seeing, just the seen" ?
    Thanks a lot.

  2. Soh Says:

    Hi Harry57,

    Please read these two links as I think it goes quite in depth in answering your question:

    If you have any further questions I'll be very happy to clarify.